What Is Mental Filtering and How to Stop It?

TL;DR

Mental filtering is a cognitive distortion where you notice only one aspect of a situation, usually the negative, while disregarding all the positives. It fuels anxiety and depression, and each worsens the other in a cycle. You can combat it by slowing down, practicing gratitude, accepting compliments, and journaling your daily wins.

Transcript

good morning internet today i'm coming to you from  my front yard herb garden which has been overtaken by my ginormous rosemary bush and some  leeks that i planted like four years ago so um yeah welcome to 2020 where  every video is filmed in like some random location in my yard today we're going  to be talking about mental filtering which is why y... Read More

Key Insights

• Mental filtering is a cognitive distortion where you see only one aspect of a situation, usually the negative side, while disregarding, minimizing, or brushing aside anything positive that doesn't fit your narrative when dealing with anxiety or depression.
• It sounds like thoughts such as 'no one is going to like me,' 'I can never do anything right,' or 'the world is a terrible place and it's getting worse every day,' hyper-focusing on a single negative detail.
• Mental filtering and depression feed each other: only noticing the bad makes life feel depressing, while feeling depressed makes you more likely to mental filter. Anxiety works the same way by attuning the brain to threats.
• The distortion is sneaky because our perception creates our reality, so we usually don't notice we're doing it. Believing everything is awful is itself a cognitive distortion where your thoughts are lying to you.
• Mental filtering serves a dysfunctional function: in genuinely dangerous situations like an abusive spouse, forgetting sweet moments can give you courage to leave. But with disordered anxiety, the world feels dangerous when it is actually safe.
• It feels good in the short term because it justifies us. Trashing your boss excuses you from working hard, and wallowing in your own brokenness excuses you from trying since 'there's nothing you can do about it.'
• Mental filtering can go both ways. A narcissist may only see the good in herself while putting others down, and it creates divides by making us see only the best in our political side and only the worst in the other.
• You can combat mental filtering by slowing down to see both sides, being intentional instead of reactionary, practicing gratitude, letting yourself sit with compliments, and journaling three daily wins to reinforce dopamine and motivation.

Questions & Answers

Q: What is mental filtering in psychology?

Mental filtering is a cognitive distortion where we only see one aspect of a situation, usually the negative side, when it comes to anxiety or depression. We focus on the negative and disregard or filter out all of the positive, picking out a single negative detail and hyper-focusing on it instead of all the other things going on. It sounds like 'no one is going to like me' or 'the world is a terrible place.'

Q: How does mental filtering cause anxiety and depression?

Mental filtering and these conditions feed each other in a cycle. Mental filtering makes us more anxious, but anxiety also makes us filter more because it attunes our brain to threats, making us more likely to notice the bad. Similarly, only noticing the bad makes life depressing, and feeling depressed makes us more likely to mental filter. Even so, we still have room for choice and can take intentional action to change how we think.

Q: Why does mental filtering feel good in the short term?

Mental filtering feels good because it justifies us. Reveling in a conversation about how terrible your boss is, disregarding all the positive things he does, can excuse you from working hard or trying hard. On the other hand, it might highlight only your own mistakes and flaws, convincing you that you are incurably broken, which also feels good to wallow in because it excuses you from trying since there's supposedly nothing you can do.

Q: Can mental filtering be positive instead of negative?

Yes, mental filtering can go both ways. While we usually think of it as only seeing the bad, associated with anxiety, depression, and self-loathing, it can go the opposite way too. For example, a narcissist may only see the good in herself, putting others down to lift herself up. It also creates political divides by making us see only the best in our candidate and only the worst in the other side.

Q: When is mental filtering actually functional or helpful?

Mental filtering serves a dysfunctional function that can occasionally help. When a situation is actually dangerous, like an abusive spouse, it can be helpful to forget any sweet moments with them to give you the courage to leave. This is functional anxiety, since anxiety is supposed to motivate us to leave dangerous situations. The problem arises with disordered anxiety, when the world feels dangerous when it's actually safe, making our exaggerated view sick.

Q: How can I stop mental filtering?

Combat mental filtering through conscious practice by slowing down and trying to see both sides of situations, since this is a skill of attention about where you put your focus. Be intentional instead of reactionary or emotional. Start by noticing when you're doing it and what function it serves, then take a deep breath, put yourself somewhere calm, and once you've gotten a little perspective, begin counteracting the filter by expanding your perspective.

Q: What daily habits help combat mental filtering?

The easiest way is to bring gratitude to mind. Let yourself sit with compliments instead of brushing them off quickly, since many people hold tightly to criticism but dismiss praise; when someone compliments you, say thank you and take it in. Make a daily habit of seeing the good you do. Using a journal template, write down three wins each day plus one or two things to improve tomorrow, which reinforces dopamine and motivation.

Q: Why do my thoughts insist everything is terrible?

Insisting everything is truly awful is itself a cognitive distortion where your thoughts are lying to you. If you have hot running water, refrigeration, electric lights, or the ability to read this on the internet, you have more luxury than kings and peasants for 99.9 percent of people in the history of the earth. This doesn't mean life isn't difficult or painful, but seeing clearly requires acknowledging both the crappy things and the positives.

Summary & Key Takeaways

• Mental filtering is the fourth cognitive distortion, where you focus on a single negative detail while filtering out the positives. Examples include a ruined day after takeout is messed up, obsessing over one wrong test answer, or remembering only critical feedback from a performance review.

• The distortion creates vicious cycles with anxiety and depression, each making the other worse. Because perception creates reality, people rarely notice they are filtering, and thoughts insisting everything is awful are themselves distorted lies rather than accurate readings of a difficult but not entirely terrible life.

• Change starts with noticing when you filter and recognizing the dysfunctional function it serves. Slowing down, calming yourself, and expanding perspective through gratitude, accepting compliments, and journaling daily wins alongside one or two improvements helps counteract the filter and reinforces motivation over time.