Maya Shankar ON: How to Embrace Change Gracefully & Find Purpose in Difficult Times

Transcript

when i lived as a monk i was trying so hard to be a monk and now i've realized that that's just one part of me i love being a messenger through media i love being a thinker i love being a content creator i love being so much more than that and that's such a big part of my identity it still is a massive part of my life it's it's the foundation of wh... Read More

Summary

In this video, Maya Shankar, the senior director of behavioral economics at Google, shares her journey and insights on human behavior. She discusses her transition from being a violinist to studying human behavior, the importance of embracing different traits and identities, and the challenges of bridging divides and changing minds. Maya also highlights the power of understanding and empathy in influencing behavior change and shares examples of effective techniques.

Questions & Answers

Q: Can you tell us about your journey from being a violinist to studying human behavior?

Maya shares that her journey began when her mother showed her a violin that belonged to her grandmother. She quickly developed a passion for playing the instrument and eventually auditioned for and got accepted into Juilliard. However, at the age of 15, she experienced a hand injury that ended her violin playing career. This forced her to reevaluate her identity and led her to realize that her passion was not just for the violin, but for connecting with people emotionally. This realization eventually led her to study human behavior and pursue a career in that field.

Q: How did the injury and the shift in identity affect your confidence?

Maya explains that the injury shattered her self-assuredness and made her question her identity. She had to grapple with existential questions about who she was without the violin in her life. However, she learned to accept the injury as an opportunity to develop a more malleable sense of self. She realized that her true passion lay in emotionally connecting with others, and she sought to find that in different pursuits throughout her life.

Q: Can you share an example of a trait in yourself that you didn't always embrace, but have learned to appreciate?

Maya mentions her impatience as a trait she initially saw as negative. However, she came to realize that her impatience was often a driving force behind her success. For instance, when she wanted to transition from academia to working in the White House, she didn't have a formal offer letter but still moved to D.C. with determination. Her impatience helped her refuse to take no for an answer and push through obstacles. She values her impatience for what it has allowed her to accomplish.

Q: How did your parents contribute to your journey as a violinist and your South Asian identity?

Maya explains that her parents played a significant role in encouraging her to pursue the violin. Her mother had brought her grandmother's violin from India and introduced it to Maya at a young age. Despite not having connections in the classical music world, her parents were fearless and took her to audition at Juilliard. As for her South Asian identity, Maya initially felt a desire to assimilate with her primarily Caucasian community. However, her parents' pride in their Indian heritage eventually helped her embrace her roots.

Q: What is something you've learned about human behavior that scares you?

Maya expresses that while it's easy to inspire behavior change in people, it's much harder for them to change their minds. Human behavior is strongly influenced by group memberships and values associated with those groups, which can distort people's perception of reality. This poses a challenge when trying to bridge divides and address polarizing issues. Changing someone's mind requires techniques beyond just presenting facts, such as acknowledging their existing values and framing arguments in ways that affirm those values.

Q: How can we effectively bridge divides and change minds when people's beliefs are deeply tied to their group memberships?

Maya highlights the importance of understanding and empathy in influencing behavior change. She talks about techniques like showing genuine curiosity about a person's beliefs, increasing the question to statement ratio to foster conversation, and affirming that discussions are not questioning their morals or values. By approaching conversations with empathy and an open mind, it becomes possible to find common ground and potentially shift perspectives.

Q: Can you share an example of someone successfully changing deeply ingrained beliefs?

Maya mentions her interview with Daryl Davis, a black jazz musician who engaged with a member of the Ku Klux Klan and inspired them to leave the group. Daryl approached the conversation with genuine curiosity and empathy, aiming to understand why the person held those beliefs. He used techniques such as affirming the person's humanity and values during the discussion. Daryl's story demonstrates that it is possible to change minds by approaching conversations with an open mind and a willingness to understand.

Q: How has studying human behavior impacted your understanding of empathy and the need for understanding others?

Maya explains that studying human behavior has deepened her empathy and expanded her understanding of others. The insights gained from her field of study allow her to view people's beliefs and actions in a broader context. She believes that studying the human mind is the greatest empathy builder because it helps unveil the complex factors that shape beliefs and behaviors. Understanding these factors allows for a more compassionate approach when engaging with others.

Q: How did you navigate your South Asian identity while growing up in a primarily Caucasian community?

Maya shares that she was initially eager to assimilate and be like her Caucasian peers. However, her parents' pride in their Indian heritage eventually helped her embrace her identity. She recalls moments of wanting to fit in, such as changing the names of characters in her stories to non-Indian names. But as she grew older, she developed a sense of pride in her Indian background. Maya also worked on the Indian version of Sesame Street, which aimed to celebrate and promote Indian culture.

Q: What is the effect of cultural values and group memberships on belief formation?

Maya discusses the influence of cultural values and group memberships on belief formation. She cites research from the 1950s where fans of opposing football teams perceived controversial referee calls differently based on their group allegiance. This demonstrates how group memberships can shape people's perception of reality, even when presented with the same information. Understanding this dynamic is crucial for effective communication and navigating belief systems.