My mother's final wish -- and the right to die with dignity | Elaine Fong

TL;DR

In this powerful talk, a brand designer shares her personal experience of designing a beautiful end-of-life experience for her mother who chose to utilize Death with Dignity legislation.

Transcript

Transcriber: What do you want to create? Where do you share this with others, and how do you want them to feel? As a brand designer, I ask a lot of questions and practice empathy to understand from people their personalities and motivations behind the why of what they do to help them express themselves, sometimes transforming ugly moments into uni... Read More

Key Insights

• 🧔 Designing for death is a challenging but important task, as it allows individuals to express themselves and have control over their end-of-life experiences.
• 👍 Death With Dignity legislation empowers individuals to decide when to end their lives when faced with a terminal illness, offering another end-of-life care option.
• 🔥 Cancer can cause immense physical pain, described by one patient as feeling like their "bones are on fire" and their whole body is burning.
• 💔 Designing end-of-life experiences should incorporate comfort, spirituality, and peace as key focus areas of support.
• 🏥 Healthcare professionals have a responsibility to have open conversations and guide patients and families in understanding all available options for end-of-life care.
• 💰 The cost of medications for end-of-life care can be a significant barrier, as not all options may be covered by insurance, adding to the complexity of the system.
• 🎉 Creating celebrations and meaningful gatherings for loved ones can bring joy and peace during the end-of-life process.
• ⚠️ The conversation around death needs to be reframed and reimagined to remove the stigma and fear associated with it, focusing on honesty, nobility, and bravery.

Questions & Answers

Q: What design challenge did the speaker face regarding her mother's end of life?

The speaker's design challenge was to create a beautiful experience for her mother's end of life after she was diagnosed with stage four cancer.

Q: What was the speaker's mother's request regarding her end of life?

The speaker's mother requested a private ceremony at home with immediate family only, no treatments or surgeries, and a celebration with a dinner party afterwards.

Q: What kind of care did the speaker's mother receive during her end of life?

The speaker's family decided to care for their mother at home, utilizing hospice and palliative care services. They also implemented creative measures to make her comfortable, such as fun exercises and watching movies together.

Q: What were the two medication options for the speaker's mother's Death With Dignity process, and what was the cost difference between them?

The two medication options were a liquid form and a pill. The liquid form cost $400, while the pill cost $4,000. Neither option was covered by insurance.

Q: How did the speaker's mother pass away, and how did her family handle the process?

The speaker's mother passed away peacefully after taking the medication. The family had a dinner party at her request, shared stories and laughter, and supported her throughout the entire process. They were grateful to have had the opportunity to say goodbye in this way.

Summary & Key Takeaways

• The speaker, a brand designer, shares her experience designing her mother's end-of-life experience when she was diagnosed with stage four cancer.

• Her mother chose to pursue Death With Dignity, a legal option in Washington state, and the speaker describes the challenges and decisions they faced.

• The experience highlighted flaws in the healthcare system and the importance of having conversations about death and end-of-life care.