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Stop Trying to FORCE Other People to Do What You Want Them To Do | Mel Robbins

14.7K views
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July 16, 2023
by
Mel Robbins
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Stop Trying to FORCE Other People to Do What You Want Them To Do | Mel Robbins

TL;DR

Acknowledge the challenges, make a wish for something better, take small steps, and change your attitude to create a new and fulfilling life.

Transcript

let's just take rule number one if they wanted to they would now that kind of stings when you think about other people when you think about folks in your life that boy I wish they'd make an effort I wish they'd show up I wish they'd reach out I wish they'd try a little bit harder I wish they'd get healthier I wish they'd yeah if they wanted to they... Read More

Key Insights

  • ☄️ Change and effort must come from within, and it's important to practice understanding and compassion towards others' struggles.
  • 😫 Set boundaries with the understanding that change can't be forced but can be motivated through empathy and support.
  • 🛟 Accept that change isn't easy but is worth it for personal growth and a more fulfilling life.

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Questions & Answers

Q: How can we deal with our frustration towards others who refuse to change or put in effort?

It's important to approach others with understanding and compassion. While it can be frustrating, accepting that change can only come from within and setting boundaries with clear expectations can motivate them to change.

Q: How can we encourage others to make positive changes in their life?

Start by identifying if the person has the capacity to change. If they do, approach them with love and support, encouraging them to seek the necessary resources or help. It's important to avoid judgment or assumptions.

Q: Why is it crucial to accept that change isn't easy?

Accepting that change requires effort and facing challenges head-on is necessary for personal growth. It allows for a realistic approach, making it easier to persevere through obstacles and stay committed to making positive changes.

Q: How can we navigate the frustration and demoralization of dealing with people who constantly wallow?

Set a boundary called the "six-month rule." Offer support and listen patiently for six months, but if the wallowing continues, express that you're no longer available to listen to complaints as it hinders their progress and personal growth.

Summary & Key Takeaways

  • There are times when we feel frustrated with others' lack of effort or change, but it's essential to remember that change and effort can only come from within.

  • It's important to approach others' behaviors with understanding and compassion, as everyone has different capabilities and challenges that may be hindering their ability to change or improve.

  • Setting boundaries and allowing others to wallow for a limited time can help motivate them to change and avoid demoralizing or shaming them.

  • Change isn't easy, but it's worth it. Accepting that change requires effort and facing challenges head-on can lead to personal growth and a more fulfilling life.


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