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Having Trouble Finding Love? Watch This! Feat. Jay Shetty | Mel Robbins Podcast Clips

16.5K views
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March 24, 2023
by
Mel Robbins
YouTube video player
Having Trouble Finding Love? Watch This! Feat. Jay Shetty | Mel Robbins Podcast Clips

TL;DR

Building a strong foundation of self-love is crucial in finding true love, as it allows individuals to know their own worth and have more to offer in a relationship.

Transcript

I want to start sort of at the beginning of the spectrum so you receive so many people from around the world every day and so do I writing in because they can't find love because they have a string of relationships that have failed and they have a story about needing to find love about I can't find love about and I I as a mom having had two daughte... Read More

Key Insights

  • 🥰 Our minds create fictional versions of our love story, which can change daily based on our thoughts and beliefs.
  • 🥰 The story we tell ourselves about love becomes our reality, so it is crucial to change the narrative to one of self-worth.
  • 😚 Solitude is an important aspect of self-discovery, allowing individuals to learn about their own preferences and avoid losing themselves in relationships.
  • 🥺 Seeking validation from others in relationships leads to settling, dependency, and fear of being alone.
  • 🥰 Childhood experiences and parental influence shape our search for love, often causing us to seek what we didn't receive from our parents.
  • 🥰 Giving ourselves the love and validation we seek from others is essential for finding true love.
  • 🍝 Reflecting on past experiences and evaluating our own likes and dislikes helps in understanding ourselves better.

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Questions & Answers

Q: Where should someone begin when trying to change their mindset about love?

The first step is to recognize that the story we tell ourselves about love becomes our reality. It is important to change the narrative and believe in our own worthiness of love.

Q: How can one figure out what they like if they have always been focused on others' preferences?

Start by reflecting on your own experiences and pay attention to what brings you joy. Take time after completing tasks or spending time with certain people to evaluate whether you genuinely enjoyed it or not.

Q: How does seeking validation from others in relationships affect our sense of self-worth?

Seeking validation from others shifts our focus away from ourselves and onto their opinions of us. This can lead to settling for less, becoming dependent on the other person, and feeling scared to be alone.

Q: How can childhood experiences and parental influence affect our search for love?

The gifts and gaps left by our parents become the map of how we look for love. If our parents were absent or critical, we may seek someone who fills those gaps. Understanding this allows us to focus on self-validation instead.

Summary & Key Takeaways

  • Many people struggle to find love due to past relationship failures and a negative view of themselves.

  • The story we tell ourselves about love becomes our reality, so it is important to change the narrative of being unlovable or not good enough.

  • Solitude, or the strength of being alone, is essential for self-discovery and understanding one's likes and dislikes.


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