"Perfectionism: Why and How to Beat It" - Strategy Turns ∊ swyx.io
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Aug 16, 2023
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"Perfectionism: Why and How to Beat It" - Strategy Turns ∊ swyx.io
In the world of behavioral psychology, there are two types of rule following: tracking and pliance. Tracking refers to following a rule that has been reinforced by positive outcomes, while pliance is following a rule because of societal expectations. Perfectionism, when it comes to our own work, is often seen as doing a great job. However, when someone else displays perfectionism, it is viewed as rigid and inflexible. The problem lies in the rigidity of adhering to excessively high standards, rather than the desire to do great work.
Perfectionism is the result of setting unrealistic standards and rigidly sticking to them. This rigidity leads to a hyperfocus on achieving impossible goals, which can result in burnout, neglecting other responsibilities, or constantly feeling miserable even when objectively doing well. The key to overcoming perfectionism is not to eliminate rules entirely, but to understand their purpose, recognize when they are helpful or harmful, and be flexible enough to follow them only when necessary.
Often, we become so attached to a rule that has been reinforced in the past, whether through positive outcomes or social pressure, that we fail to see situations where it no longer serves us. This is known as rule-governed behavior. To overcome this, we need to shift towards contingency-shaped behavior, where we let our experiences teach us and guide our actions. By doing so, we can run our lives more effectively than through rigid rule-following.
To make this shift, it is crucial to understand our values. Values are the directions we want our lives to go in and the qualities we want to embody along the journey. They act as guideposts when we find ourselves caught in the grip of perfectionism. Unlike goals, which have an end date and can leave us feeling lost once accomplished, values provide intrinsic motivation and remain accessible at all times.
Research suggests that individuals are more likely to approach challenging circumstances if they align with their personal values. Therefore, it is essential to identify and prioritize our values, as they can serve as a powerful motivator in overcoming perfectionism. By recognizing that perfectionistic thoughts and ideas point towards what truly matters to us, we can separate them from socially expected standards of behavior.
Developing awareness is a powerful tool in breaking free from perfectionism. By consistently practicing awareness, we gain the ability to create space from our thoughts and emotions. This is known as defusion, and it allows us to choose how to behave rather than being driven solely by our perfectionistic tendencies. Once we have defused from our thoughts, the next step is to reconnect with our values and align our actions accordingly. Embracing variability in behavior, which is encouraged by following our values, allows us to learn and grow.
In the world of entrepreneurship, the concept of strategy turns comes into play. First-time founders are often consumed by perfecting their product, while second-time founders shift their focus towards distribution. Building an audience and establishing a strong presence in the industry is crucial for long-term success. However, it is important to balance ownership and discoverability.
Starting by blogging on a community site, such as Medium or Dev.to, allows for increased discoverability and access to social features. This can help in building an audience and establishing credibility. However, as one becomes more established, it is beneficial to transition towards blogging on one's own site. This provides more ownership and control over content, as well as the opportunity to build an email list.
Additionally, as an industry becomes more regulated, it becomes harder for newer startups to enter the market and replicate the success of established players. Industry regulations also help in defining clear boundaries and compliance with the law, reducing the need for constant tradeoffs.
In conclusion, perfectionism can be overcome by understanding the purpose of rules, being flexible in their application, and aligning actions with personal values. Developing awareness and defusing from perfectionistic thoughts allows for greater freedom in decision-making. Embracing variability in behavior and focusing on distribution are key in entrepreneurship. Starting with a community site and transitioning to one's own platform allows for both discoverability and ownership. Lastly, industry regulations can provide stability and reduce the need for constant tradeoffs. By implementing these strategies, we can beat perfectionism and achieve success in our endeavors.
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