Conversational Canyons: Labeling Yourself is Keeping You Down, Do This Instead

Tara H

Hatched by Tara H

Apr 15, 2024

3 min read


Conversational Canyons: Labeling Yourself is Keeping You Down, Do This Instead


In our daily lives, we engage in numerous conversations, both casual and meaningful. These conversations provide us with opportunities to connect with others, exchange ideas, and deepen our understanding of various topics. However, it is often challenging to remember and retain the essence of these conversations, leading to missed opportunities for growth and connection. In this article, we will explore the concept of "Conversational Canyons" and discuss how labeling ourselves can hinder personal development. Moreover, we will provide actionable advice on how to overcome these obstacles and make the most out of our conversational experiences.

Conversational Canyons and Effective Note-Taking:

One effective way to navigate the conversational canyons is through note-taking. By adding a notebook to our conversations, we can jot down short summaries of what we discuss, allowing us to revisit and expand on these topics in later conversations. These notes serve as a valuable reference point, enabling us to retain important information and insights. Additionally, incorporating keywords during conversations aids our memory and helps us organize our thoughts when we review our notes later. This practice not only keeps the conversation alive in our minds but also facilitates the evolution of our thinking as we revise and connect different ideas. Sharing these notes with others, if desired, can further enhance the collaborative nature of conversations.

The Pitfalls of Labeling Ourselves:

Language plays a significant role in shaping our expectations, which, in turn, shape our reality. When we label ourselves, we confine our identity to a static concept, limiting our potential for growth and change. For instance, saying, "I am a procrastinator," reinforces the belief that procrastination is an inherent trait, making it harder to break free from this behavior. Instead, we should adopt a more empowering perspective by reframing our self-perceptions. Rather than labeling ourselves with simple nouns, we can describe ourselves as individuals who engage in specific actions. By saying, "I am someone who often procrastinates (but can stop if I want!)," we acknowledge our current tendencies while emphasizing our ability to change and improve.

Embracing Fluidity and Growth:

To make the most out of our conversational experiences, it is crucial to embrace the fluidity of our identities and remain open to growth. By recognizing that our labels do not define us, we can liberate ourselves from the constraints they impose. This mindset allows us to explore new perspectives, challenge our preconceived notions, and engage in meaningful discussions that foster personal development. Moreover, by viewing conversations as dynamic and ever-evolving, we can approach them with curiosity, actively seeking opportunities to learn from others and expand our knowledge.

Actionable Advice:

  • 1. Practice Effective Note-Taking: Incorporate a notebook or a note-taking system to capture the essence of your conversations. Jot down short summaries, keywords, and thoughts that arise during the discussion. Regularly revisit and revise your notes to keep the conversation alive in your mind and foster connections between different ideas.
  • 2. Reframe Your Self-Perceptions: Instead of labeling yourself with fixed nouns, adopt a more empowering perspective by focusing on your actions. Describe yourself as someone who engages in specific behaviors, acknowledging your current tendencies while emphasizing your capacity for growth and change.
  • 3. Embrace Fluidity and Growth: Approach conversations with an open mind and a willingness to learn from others. View them as opportunities for personal development and challenge your existing beliefs and assumptions. Embrace the dynamic nature of conversations and remain curious about new perspectives and ideas.


In the vast canyons of conversation, effective note-taking and reframing our self-perceptions can guide us towards personal growth and meaningful connections. By capturing the essence of our discussions and embracing fluidity in our identities, we can navigate these conversational landscapes with confidence and openness. Remember, the power of conversations lies not only in the words we speak but also in our ability to listen, learn, and evolve. So, let us embark on this journey of exploration, armed with our notebooks and a mindset of growth.

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