"The Viktor Frankl Achievement Paradox Silently Sabotages People's Lives: How Clarity and Kindness Can Lead to Success"

"The Viktor Frankl Achievement Paradox Silently Sabotages People's Lives: How Clarity and Kindness Can Lead to Success"

In our quest for happiness and success, we often find ourselves chasing after elusive goals. We make happiness our target, believing that once we achieve it, all will be well. However, Viktor Frankl, a renowned psychiatrist and Holocaust survivor, challenges this notion. He believes that the more we make happiness our sole focus, the more we miss the mark. Happiness, according to Frankl, installs itself when we shift our attention away from ourselves and towards a larger cause.

Oprah Winfrey echoes this sentiment, emphasizing that true happiness and success come when we give ourselves to the world. When we focus less on personal achievement and more on helping others, good things naturally start to happen. It is a beautiful paradox that when we let go of the pursuit of happiness, it finds us.

So, instead of asking what life can do for us, let us ask what we can do for life. In the darkest corners of the world, where hope seems lost, Viktor Frankl observed that those who survived were oriented towards a future. They held onto the belief that they would be free again, that they had a purpose to fulfill, or that they would be reunited with their loved ones. These individuals found meaning in their suffering, and that gave them the strength to persevere.

Inspired by John F. Kennedy's famous quote, we can apply this mindset to our daily lives. Instead of setting ambitious goals that may feel overwhelming, studies suggest that focusing on small, actionable steps can lead to greater success. By breaking down our goals into manageable tasks, we can make progress and build momentum over time.

However, success is not only about achieving personal goals—it is also about how we lead and interact with others. In a study on leadership concerns, one issue stood out: avoiding tough conversations. Leaders often shy away from giving honest and productive feedback, fearing discomfort or conflict. Yet, as Brené Brown asserts, clear is kind, and unclear is unkind.

When we feed people half-truths or withhold expectations, we are being unkind. It may temporarily make us feel better, but it ultimately hinders growth and progress. Instead, we must have the courage to engage in what Brown calls a "rumble." A rumble is a discussion or meeting where vulnerability is embraced, curiosity is nurtured, and problem-solving is prioritized. It entails owning our parts, listening passionately, and being brave in our interactions.

To cultivate clarity and kindness in our lives, here are three actionable pieces of advice:

• 1. Shift your focus from personal achievement to a larger cause. Find ways to contribute to the well-being of others and the world around you. This shift in perspective can bring about a sense of fulfillment and genuine happiness.

• 2. Break down your goals into smaller, manageable tasks. Instead of overwhelming yourself with grand ambitions, focus on taking small steps that lead to progress. Celebrate each milestone along the way, and let the sense of accomplishment drive you forward.

• 3. Embrace courageous conversations. Avoiding tough discussions may provide temporary relief, but it hinders growth and fosters misunderstandings. Lean into vulnerability, be open to feedback, and strive for clarity and kindness in your interactions.

In conclusion, the pursuit of happiness and success can be paradoxical. By shifting our focus away from personal achievement and towards a larger cause, we often find that happiness naturally installs itself in our lives. Furthermore, clear communication and kind interactions are crucial for personal growth and effective leadership. Let us remember that clarity is kind, and by embracing vulnerability and courageous conversations, we can create a more fulfilling and successful life. Stay awkward, brave, and kind.