Strategies to Find Validation and Acceptance From Within | Natasha Ghosh | TEDxKerrisdale Women

TL;DR

This content discusses the struggle of seeking external validation and the importance of finding validation from within oneself through the use of the Me Not Me and Me Now Me approach.

Transcript

what will my mother say it wasn't until a few years ago at the age of 44 that this question or some variation of it didn't get asked before during or after every decision that I made the question sounded a little bit like how will I tell her how will she react how can I spin this exactly right I was 44 years old before I stopped asking what will my... Read More

Key Insights

• ❓ Seeking external validation is a common struggle, influenced by societal norms, upbringing, and personal experiences.
• 🆘 The Me Not Me approach helps in reframing interpretations and understanding others' perspectives.
• 🤳 The Me Now Me approach focuses on introspection and self-acceptance, offering validation from within.
• 🥰 The journey to finding validation from within involves allowing different versions of oneself to be seen, heard, and understood.

Questions & Answers

Q: How did the author's need for acceptance and validation from their mother manifest throughout their life?

The author experienced this need from their childhood to adulthood, always seeking their mother's approval in their decisions and feeling a sense of guilt and shame when their choices didn't align with their mother's expectations.

Q: What is the Me Not Me approach and how does it help in finding validation from within?

Me Not Me is a system created by the author that allows individuals to see a situation from different perspectives, stepping outside of themselves, and reframing interpretations. This helps detach from seeking external validation and take accountability for one's own self.

Q: How does the Me Now Me approach differ from the Me Not Me approach?

While Me Not Me focuses on understanding others and shifting perspectives, Me Now Me emphasizes introspection and self-acceptance. It encourages individuals to tap into their current wisdom and experience to provide their own approval and validation.

Q: How can the Me Not Me and Me Now Me approaches assist in shifting one's relationship with oneself and others?

These approaches empower individuals to release themselves from past narratives, validate their past selves, and hear their own voice. This leads to a stronger relationship with oneself and the ability to respond to situations in a way that serves them best.

Summary & Key Takeaways

• The content explores the personal journey of the author, who has struggled with seeking approval and validation from others, particularly from their mother, throughout their life.

• The Me Not Me approach is introduced as a method of reframing interpretations of situations and understanding the perspectives of others, allowing individuals to respond instead of react.

• The Me Now Me approach goes beyond external understanding and perspective, focusing on introspection and self-acceptance, offering validation and approval to all versions of oneself.