It's OK to feel overwhelmed. Here's what to do next | Elizabeth Gilbert

TL;DR

In this TED Connects conversation, Elizabeth Gilbert shares insights on managing anxiety, embracing curiosity, and finding compassion amidst the COVID-19 pandemic.

Transcript

Transcriber: Joseph Geni Reviewer: Krystian Aparta Chris Anderson: Well, hello, Helen. Very nice to see you. CA: You staying well? Helen Walters: How's it going? CA: These are mad, mad, mad, mad, mad days. So many emotions. Not all bad, happily, but I'm just so aware that, among the people listening to this, some are in really tough times right now... Read More

Key Insights

• 💡 In times of crisis, it is important to show compassion and mercy towards oneself and others, especially for the difficult emotions we may be feeling. Letting go of control and surrendering to the present moment can help alleviate anxiety and fear. It's important to remember that humans are adaptable and resilient, and we have a history of overcoming challenges. Curiosity, rather than passion, can guide us in creative endeavors during isolation. Loneliness can be embraced as an opportunity for self-discovery and growth. Walking towards difficult emotions with an open mind can lead to transformation. Grief cannot be managed but can be endured with compassion. There is hope that this crisis can lead to a more compassionate and united society. Anger can serve as a catalyst for positive change when channeled and harnessed appropriately. By letting go of the myth of control, we can find acceptance in the face of uncertainty. Acts of service and gratitude can contribute to personal growth and create positive change in the world. Finally, writing a letter from Love to oneself can help to reduce fear and shame and provide comfort and guidance.

Questions & Answers

Q: How can we handle feelings of anxiety during this challenging time?

Elizabeth Gilbert suggests giving ourselves compassion and mercy for the difficult emotions we are feeling. She advises not to shame ourselves for feeling frightened or anxious and to understand that these emotions are understandable given the circumstances. Gilbert also highlights the importance of recognizing our resilience as humans and the adaptive nature of our species.

Q: How can we handle feelings of loneliness during isolation?

Gilbert acknowledges that it is difficult to avoid feelings of loneliness during isolation, but suggests that instead of rushing away from these emotions, we should walk towards them with curiosity. She encourages us to explore the experience of being alone and to practice self-compassion and compassion towards others. Gilbert believes that this moment presents an opportunity for growth and to develop a deeper understanding of the human experience.

Q: Is this a good time to pursue our passions or be creative?

Gilbert argues that rather than focusing solely on passion, we should follow our curiosity. She believes that curiosity is a gentler approach, with lower stakes, unlike the pressure associated with finding and pursuing one's passion. Gilbert encourages people to engage in creative activities that they enjoy, as it can be a source of comfort and distraction during difficult times.

Q: How can we manage and handle grief during this challenging time?

Gilbert states that grief is a complex emotion, and there is no one-size-fits-all solution for managing it. She emphasizes the importance of allowing ourselves to feel the pain and sorrow of grief, without trying to control or manage it. Gilbert shares a story about a woman who survived a harrowing experience and learned to surrender her fear to intuition. She suggests that surrendering to the moment and trusting our intuition can help us navigate grief.

Q: How can we let go of control during this time and be willing to feel our emotions?

According to Gilbert, recognizing that the sense of control we think we have is a myth is the first step. She explains that control is an illusion and that surrendering to the reality that we never had control can be a source of relaxation and relief. Gilbert encourages us to accept the inevitability of change and the fact that we cannot control everything, and instead, focus on the present moment and the actions we can take.

Q: Is there hope that anger can be transformed into a force for good?

Gilbert acknowledges the potential for anger to highlight injustices and spark transformation. She points out that anger can lead to both positive and negative outcomes, depending on how it is channeled. Gilbert suggests that anger should be acknowledged and allowed, but not used as a means to lash out or spread negativity. She believes that anger can be transformed into an opportunity for personal and societal growth, leading to positive changes in the world.

Q: How can we reduce fear and shame during this time?

Gilbert shares her personal practice of writing herself a letter from Love every day to help calm her anxiety. The letter serves as a reminder that she is supported and loved, regardless of how she is feeling or what decisions she makes. Gilbert explains that the practice allows her mind to settle and provides a sense of security and comfort. She suggests finding practices that bring comfort and reassurance during these challenging times.

Summary & Key Takeaways

• Elizabeth Gilbert shares insights on managing anxiety during challenging times, emphasizing the importance of self-compassion and acknowledging difficult emotions.

• She encourages individuals to embrace curiosity and creativity as a way to navigate isolation and find meaning during this period.

• Gilbert also highlights the power of compassion, recognizing the suffering of others and finding ways to help, while reminding individuals to take care of themselves and pace their efforts.