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5 Questions You Should Never Ask Your Mentor

87.9K views
•
October 10, 2016
by
Dan Martell
YouTube video player
5 Questions You Should Never Ask Your Mentor

TL;DR

Learn five questions to avoid asking your mentor.

Transcript

  • Don't ask somebody to be your mentor. Don't do it. If you type the words, "Hal, can you be my mentor?" you've already messed up. (upbeat music) Five questions you should never ever, ever, ever ask your mentor, that's what I wanna share in this video because having a mentor could be one of the most incredible opportunities for you to really grow ... Read More

Key Insights

  • Never ask a mentor to be your mentor directly; it puts unnecessary pressure on the relationship and may deter them from helping.
  • Instead of asking how they achieved success, ask mentors what they would do today to gain actionable and relevant advice.
  • Avoid asking for a step-by-step roadmap as each business is unique, and mentors prefer to offer strategic guidance rather than specific instructions.
  • Do not request financial investment from a mentor, as it can complicate the relationship and shift the dynamic from mentorship to investment.
  • Asking for handouts, such as referrals or resources, can strain the mentor relationship; wait for them to offer assistance voluntarily.
  • Becoming a customer of your mentor can bias their advice; keep the relationship purely mentorship-focused for unbiased guidance.
  • Honor your mentors by sharing stories of how they have helped you, which strengthens the mentor-mentee bond and acknowledges their impact.
  • Mentors provide unbiased advice because they are not financially or personally invested in your business, unlike partners or investors.

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Questions & Answers

Q: Why should you avoid asking someone to be your mentor directly?

Asking someone directly to be your mentor can create undue pressure and may make them uncomfortable. It can also come off as presumptuous, as it assumes a level of commitment that the potential mentor may not be ready to provide. Instead, it's better to build a relationship organically, allowing mentorship to develop naturally over time.

Q: What is the difference between asking 'How did you do it?' and 'How would you do it today?'

The question 'How did you do it?' focuses on past actions, which may not be relevant in the current business environment. In contrast, 'How would you do it today?' prompts the mentor to consider current market conditions and provide advice that is more applicable to today's challenges, offering strategic and updated guidance.

Q: Why is it not advisable to ask for a step-by-step roadmap from your mentor?

Requesting a step-by-step roadmap from a mentor is not advisable because every business is unique, with different challenges and resources. Mentors are better suited to provide strategic guidance rather than specific instructions. This approach encourages creativity and adaptability, allowing you to develop solutions tailored to your specific situation.

Q: What are the potential consequences of asking a mentor for money?

Asking a mentor for money can alter the dynamic of the relationship, shifting it from mentorship to investment. This change can lead to conflicts of interest and impact the mentor's ability to provide unbiased advice. It may also put undue pressure on the mentor, making them uncomfortable and potentially damaging the relationship.

Q: Why should you avoid asking for handouts from your mentor?

Asking for handouts, such as referrals or resources, can strain the mentor-mentee relationship by making the mentor feel used or taken advantage of. The mentor has already invested time and energy in providing guidance, and additional requests can be seen as burdensome. It's better to wait for the mentor to offer assistance voluntarily.

Q: How does becoming a customer of your mentor affect the mentorship relationship?

Becoming a customer of your mentor can bias their advice, as they may have a vested interest in your success. This can compromise the objectivity of their guidance, which is a key benefit of mentorship. Keeping the relationship purely mentorship-focused ensures that advice remains unbiased and in your best interest.

Q: What is the importance of honoring your mentors?

Honoring your mentors by sharing stories of their positive influence acknowledges their impact and strengthens the mentor-mentee bond. It shows appreciation for their guidance and can inspire others to seek mentorship. Publicly recognizing mentors also reinforces their role in your success and can encourage them to continue supporting you.

Q: How does mentorship differ from advice from partners or investors?

Mentorship differs from advice from partners or investors because mentors are not financially or personally invested in your business. This lack of bias allows them to provide objective advice based solely on what is best for your growth and success, free from conflicts of interest that might influence partners or investors.

Summary & Key Takeaways

  • The video discusses five questions to avoid asking your mentor to maintain a healthy and productive mentor-mentee relationship. It emphasizes the importance of framing questions to gain insightful and applicable advice rather than seeking direct answers or financial support.

  • Key points include reframing questions for actionable advice, avoiding requests for financial support or handouts, and maintaining an unbiased relationship by not becoming a customer. The speaker also encourages viewers to honor their mentors by sharing stories of their positive influence.

  • The speaker shares personal experiences with mentors and stresses the value of mentorship in business growth. Viewers are encouraged to engage with the content by leaving comments about their mentors and subscribing for more business growth tips and resources.


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