What We Get Wrong About Negotiation w/ Alexandra Carter

TL;DR

Learn expert negotiation techniques to empower your relationships and achieve your goals.

Transcript

Hey, it's Marie Forleo, and welcome to another episode of MarieTV and the Marie Forleo Podcast. If you've ever wished that you were a stronger, better negotiator, you are going to love today's episode. My guest is Alex Carter. She teaches negotiation skills at Columbia Law School, and she's trained thousands of people all over the world, including ... Read More

Key Insights

• 💍 Negotiation is about steering relationships effectively, not engaging in adversarial conflicts.
• 😷 Asking the right questions plays a crucial role in successful negotiation and relationship-building.
• 🪡 Understanding and managing personal needs, both tangible and intangible, drive negotiation strategies.
• 👋 Assuming the best of others and staying curious fosters productive and empathetic conversations.
• 😨 Fear and guilt can impact negotiations and relationships negatively; addressing these emotions is essential for effective communication.
• 😃 Transforming a no into a yes involves empathy, active listening, and addressing concerns collaboratively.
• 🏛️ Sharing personal experiences and insights can enhance the negotiation process and build trust.

Questions & Answers

Q: What is negotiation according to Alex Carter?

Alex Carter defines negotiation as any conversation where relationships are steered towards mutual benefit, emphasizing the importance of understanding and managing relationships.

Q: Why is opening with "tell us about" more effective than "why" in negotiations?

Opening with "tell us about" fosters trust, gathers valuable information, and moves the conversation from blame to collaboration, creating a platform for effective communication and negotiation.

Q: Why do people avoid asking for more, according to Alex Carter?

People, especially women, often avoid asking for more due to societal conditioning, fear, or a lack of awareness of the long-term consequences. Carter highlights the impact of negotiations on long-term financial outcomes and personal value.

Q: How can one turn a no into a yes in negotiations?

By asking "What are your concerns?" one can address underlying issues, demonstrate empathy, and create a collaborative environment, leading to turning a no into a yes through understanding and effective communication.

Summary & Key Takeaways

• Alex Carter, a negotiation expert, discusses her book "Ask for More: Ten Questions to Negotiate Anything."

• Negotiation is about steering relationships, not adversarial conflicts.

• Asking the right questions is key to successful negotiations.