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How to Effectively Receive Feedback Without Getting Defensive

74.1K views
•
March 31, 2014
by
Talks at Google
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How to Effectively Receive Feedback Without Getting Defensive

TL;DR

To effectively receive feedback without becoming defensive, recognize your common triggers: truth, relationship, and identity. Understanding how you typically respond and developing strategies to manage these triggers can enhance your ability to process feedback constructively, promoting personal and professional growth.

Transcript

LOUISE: It's my pleasure to welcome today Doug Stone and Sheila Heen, the authors of the new book, "Thanks for the Feedback: The Science and the Art of Receiving Feedback Well." Sheila and Doug are lecturers of law at Harvard and founders of the Triad Consulting Group. They authored the classic best-seller "Difficult Conversations" and have now rel... Read More

Key Insights

  • ❓ Feedback comprises different triggers, including truth triggers, relationship triggers, and identity triggers, which impact how individuals perceive and react to feedback.
  • 📞 Recognizing one's own tendencies and triggers when receiving feedback is an important first step towards effective feedback reception.
  • 🛩️ Seeking feedback regularly and using techniques like small experiments can help individuals learn from and utilize feedback more effectively.
  • 🪘 Understanding one's own baseline, swing, and how long certain emotions linger can assist in managing reactions to feedback and maintaining objectivity.

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Questions & Answers

Q: How can feedback be helpful for personal and professional growth?

Feedback provides insights into areas where improvement is needed and helps individuals develop self-awareness. By receiving feedback, individuals can identify and work on their weaknesses, optimize their performance, and foster personal and professional development.

Q: What are some common challenges faced when receiving feedback?

Truth triggers, relationship triggers, and identity triggers are three common challenges in receiving feedback. Truth triggers may involve dismissing feedback that doesn't make sense. Relationship triggers can be caused by the giver's motives or communication style. Identity triggers involve feeling threatened by feedback that challenges one's sense of self.

Summary & Key Takeaways

  • Feedback is crucial for growth and development in both personal and professional lives.

  • Giving and receiving feedback can sometimes be difficult and trigger various emotional responses.

  • Understanding the different types of feedback triggers and learning techniques for processing feedback can improve one's ability to grow and learn from feedback.


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