Finishing Tasks Isn't Rewarding

TL;DR

Many individuals experience relief instead of a sense of achievement after accomplishing tasks due to stress-based motivation, the shame gap between ideal and real selves, and imposter syndrome.

Transcript

so the more that we sort of create this idealized version of ourselves and the more that we move towards it oh i'm not gonna make it i'm not gonna make it i'm not gonna make it oh my god will i make it will i make it will i make it what if i don't live up to those expectations and i finally make it ah thank god relief can someone explain this my to... Read More

Key Insights

• 🤔 Stress-based motivation leads to a sense of relief rather than accomplishment, so finding alternative motivations can help in feeling accomplished.
• 🧩 The "shame gap" and idealized self-image can prevent a sense of accomplishment, as we may be striving for goals that aren't truly our own, leading to relief rather than pride.
• 😔 Imposter syndrome can hinder the ability to feel accomplished, as individuals attribute their successes to luck or external factors, making it difficult to take credit for their own actions.
• 🔑 Recognizing and understanding the cognitive factors that contribute to a lack of accomplishment can help in changing the mindset and finding ways to feel more accomplished. ⏳ Taking a step back and reflecting on the purpose and importance of a task or goal can shift the motivation from stress to a genuine desire to achieve, resulting in a sense of accomplishment.
• 💡 Letting go of idealized versions of ourselves and focusing on personal growth and progress can create a more realistic and fulfilling sense of achievement.
• 🌟 For individuals with imposter syndrome, it is important to question the reasons behind the inability to give oneself credit and work on gradually acknowledging personal contributions to successes.
• 🙌 Overcoming a lack of accomplishment involves mindset shifts, introspection, and reframing goals and motivations to align with personal values and aspirations.

Questions & Answers

Q: How does stress-based motivation affect our sense of achievement?

Stress-based motivation is primarily driven by the desire to alleviate stress, so when the stressor is gone, individuals feel relief rather than a sense of accomplishment. This is because the primary focus is on the removal of stress, not personal achievement.

Q: How does the shame gap contribute to feeling relief instead of accomplishment?

The shame gap exists between the idealized self and the real self, fueled by societal expectations and "shoulds." When individuals achieve goals that are not genuinely their own, they experience relief rather than accomplishment because they are merely meeting external expectations.

Q: Why do people with imposter syndrome struggle to feel accomplished after achieving something?

People with imposter syndrome attribute their success to external factors, believing they have fooled others into thinking they are capable. This lack of self-credit leads to a sense of relief rather than accomplishment, as they do not believe they deserve the achievement.

Q: How can one shift from feeling relief to a sense of accomplishment?

Shifting from stress-based motivation requires reevaluating the reasons behind one's actions and finding intrinsic motivation. Abandoning the shame gap involves focusing on personal goals and accepting where one is currently at. Overcoming imposter syndrome involves acknowledging one's own efforts and giving oneself credit for achievements.

Summary & Key Takeaways

• Stress-based motivation, where stress is the primary motivator, leads to a sense of relief rather than accomplishment.

• The shame gap between the ideal self and real self, driven by "shoulds," prevents individuals from feeling accomplished when achieving goals.

• Imposter syndrome causes individuals to attribute their success to external factors and struggle to take credit for their achievements.