How gratitude makes you more attractive | Sara Algoe | Big Think | Summary and Q&A

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April 15, 2021
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Big Think
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How gratitude makes you more attractive | Sara Algoe | Big Think

TL;DR

Expressing gratitude strengthens relationships and fosters connections within communities.

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Key Insights

  • 🥹 Gratitude signals value and appreciation, strengthening relationship bonds.
  • 🤟 Specific gestures of thanks drive closeness and affection in romantic relationships.
  • 😑 Witnessing expressions of gratitude fosters openness and self-disclosure in individuals and communities.
  • 🙇 Gratitude has ripple effects, making both the person expressing thanks and the recipient more appealing.
  • 🥰 Love blurs boundaries between the self and the other, fostering a willingness to sacrifice for the other person.
  • 🤟 Small gestures like saying "thank you" have the potential to establish better relationships.
  • 💨 Gratitude has reverberating effects within social networks, connecting communities in meaningful ways.

Transcript

SARA ALGOE: When we get into a romantic  relationship, it's all sparks, and flowers,   and hikes, and coffees. But over time, the  romantic couple gets into routines. And so   what we've argued is that the moments of gratitude  still matter, because when we say "thank you,"   we're sending a message to the person who just  did something nice for us... Read More

Questions & Answers

Q: Why is expressing gratitude important in romantic relationships?

Expressing gratitude in relationships shows appreciation and value, driving closeness and affection between partners, ultimately leading to lasting bonds.

Q: How does witnessing gratitude affect people in a community?

Witnessing expressions of gratitude prompts increased openness and self-disclosure, fostering connections within communities by making both the person being thanked and the thanker more appealing.

Q: What role does self-disclosure play in building lasting relationships?

Self-disclosure, influenced by expressing gratitude, opens doors to more enduring and lasting bonds as individuals gradually reveal more about themselves, fostering deeper connections.

Q: How does expressing gratitude impact the perception of a partner's character?

Expressing gratitude conveys that a partner is compassionate and helpful, making them appealing to others, even those who witness the gratitude exchange without knowing the partner personally.

Summary & Key Takeaways

  • Dr. Sara Algoe emphasizes the importance of expressing gratitude in romantic relationships to show appreciation and value.

  • Specific gestures of thanks drive closeness and affection between partners, leading to lasting bonds.

  • Witnessing expressions of gratitude prompts increased openness and self-disclosure, fostering community connections.

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