Top Highlights

• The narcissistic mother requires, of course, a “perfect” child to mirror her perfection as a giver and nurturer of life. If the real child disappoints in some way—by appearance, or sex, or some other flaw—she herself will feel defective, triggering shame and rage.
• For Narcissists, competition of all kinds is a way to reaffirm superiority, although many will only compete when they anticipate a favorable outcome. Deeply shamed by defeat, they tend to choose arenas in which they can shine without much risk or effort, and when success happens, they may become compulsive in their pursuit of perfection. Along the ...
• “My feelings and needs are all that matter, and whatever I want, I should get.” Mutuality and reciprocity are entirely alien concepts, because others exist only to agree, obey, flatter, and comfort—in short, to anticipate and meet my every need. If you cannot make yourself useful in meeting my need, you are of no value and will most likely be treat...
• In social situations, you will talk about them or what they are interested in because they are more important, more knowledgeable, or more captivating than anyone else.
• In personal relationships, their sense of entitlement means that you must attend to their needs but they are under no obligation to listen to or understand you.